Monday, January 6, 2014

Traditional Latkes

I know it's the new year and everyone is trying to watch their figure but who doesn't love latkes? They are perfect and versatile. Breakfast? No problem. Dinner? Hell yeah. Dipping sauces? Sour cream or apple sauce. That's right, you get choices. I know it's not hard to sell fried potatoes but there is nothing quite like a good latke. Imagine a world where you could get latkes as a fast food side. That's the world I want to live in. There needs to be a big push to have these more than once a year; Hanukkah is great but I want latkes year round.

The perfect latke is simply incredibly crispy potato and onion shreds barely held together with some egg. When you bite into it you want to hear that loud crunch. Unlike hash browns, you don't want a moist center; you want this thing to be all crunch all the time. You also never want to have that one bite that is overwhelmingly just egg, it's like getting pennies on Halloween. I mean look at the photo above. How fucking crispy are those things? Seriously, look how crispy those things are. The truest secret is taking the time to drain the water out of the potatoes to ensure they will be crisp as humanly possible. Skip this step and you'll have limp latkes.

Qty Ingredient Procedure
5 Medium potatoes1
  1. Start by grating the potatoes and the onion. I used a food processor to avoid making my knuckles look like I just took on Kimbo Slice2 for three rounds.
  2. Drain as much water from the potatoes and the onion as possible. If you have a potato ricer, I like putting the mixture in there and pressing the water out. If no ricer is available, use a clean dish towel and wring out the excess water.
1 large onion
3 eggs
  1. Combine the potato/onion mixture, eggs, and flour. Season the mixture with salt and pepper. The mixture should be wet without being too dry.
3 tbsp flour
Oil to fry in
  1. Preheat an oven to 200°F with a baking sheet in it. Heat a frying pan over medium high heat with about a quarter inch of oil. I recommend doing a small test latke at this point and adding more flour or egg as needed.
  2. Fry until brown and extremely crispy and flip. Once done place on baking sheet to keep warm until all of the latkes are done. Or if you're me just start eating them immediately and have your mouth become one giant gaping wound.

  1. I prefer to use russet potatoes as they tend to crisp up better when fried 
  2. Dana White ruined any chance of Kimbo Slice ever being a great pro fighter 


  1. How did you get that fork in the forty bottle??

    1. It started out as a cockail fork and grew up. It's kinda sick to keep it locked up that whole time, but oh well.